Cash For Congresscritters

Libertarians, realizing the failure of the President's "Cash For Clunkers" rebate program, have promulgated a major new plan.

The Party is expected to make this major announcement at a news conference later this week. We have obtained an advanced copy of the proposal, which is named:

"CASH FOR CONGRESSCRITTERS", and it works like this...

Citizens wishing to promote smaller, less intrusive government, individual freedom, and more free enterprise will be required to turn in one member of Congress. The amount the government grants them will be fixed according to a sliding scale. Older and less freedom-minded 'Congresscritters' will garner the highest amounts.

Special "Bonuses" will be paid for those submitting Congresscritters in targeted groups, such as liberal Democrats, RINOs, tax cheats, and any member of the House Ways & Means Committee.

Smaller bonuses will be given for Congresscritters who have voted in favor of the 2nd Amendment, lower taxes, less government spending, or against the appointment of Ben Bernanke or Sonja Sotomayor.

Initally, the plan was that all Congresscritters would be rendered totally useless via toxic injection. However, this part of the plan was deleted due to the fact that all of the target Congresscritters were totally useless anyway. Instead, they will be shipped off to some remote South Pacific island where they can harm no one but themselves.


Post a Comment

<< Home